Here in Texas!

Hello from Rockport Texas! We have had so much going on, but not nearly enough!

Every time we have had time to plant it has rained. It is getting frustrating to not get things accomplished due to the weather. I am determined to get our seedlings in the ground even if it is raining this week! Our vining plants, corn, and sunflowers are simply not going to wait for us any longer. 

Lucky's first litter of babies are due anytime now. I am very nervous on how she is going to handle birthing and motherhood. Pray everything goes smoothly for her and the babies.

This week we are welcoming six baby chicks, two cornish white, two rhode island reds, and two white leg horns. More prayers to hoping we ended up with a rooster in the bunch... and only one.

This week we also welcomed, my mare, Molly's long awaited foal. She had a beautiful healthy filly we have named Bell per my crazy girl Kayley's request.

We are also getting a cute little male blue heeler pup in a few weeks to add to our herd.

Sara ended up needing glasses when we went to the eye doctor last week. She picked out some cute blue frames. Kayley is officially potty trained and excited to be going to school next year. Michael Wayne is finally acting interested in the potty. Thomas is coming up with several new words a week. Logan had a boy scout camp this last weekend and had a blast! Everyone is hopeful Daddy will be home at least for a visit in 6-8weeks. We are having a great time staying with my grandmother. I start Spanish and algebra in college on the 7th. We are heading to visit my parents for a week on Thursday. I am going to start working on getting set up to be a scout leader for boy and girl scouts here soon too.

As y'all can tell we've got a lot going on around here getting a foundation for our new chapter in life started up. Now to iron out the wrinkles and get daddy home!

How much change is healthy for a person?

The little girl that changed my entire life several years ago just turned 8 the end of January. She was very excited with all her presents. She got a toy dog, a new fishing rod, a boombox, and an airsoft pistol.

Now we are back to reality. My cousin left this morning from our visit together and on the road to her new life with her husband and adorable son. I have an enormous amount of cleaning and packing to do still before the kids and I head to Texas. So much moving is going on not just with us but all around us.

I have also been considering other changes. Everyone probably knows I am currently majoring in environmental science with plans to transfer and major in agriculture.  The more and more I think about this though, and the more I progress my education the less it feels right. It seems like a ridiculous fantasy, but I feel that I should be writing to inspire people. People who have read my work before say mix things. Some people love my writing and question why I do not write more or get my work published. Other people are not as enthusiastic about my works and rate it very low. So I sit and ponder if I should stay on my current track or adventure to a less familiar path and write.

Changing winds...

It is cold here in northern middle Tennessee, but that sure has not slowed us down.  We are more busy then ever. The kids and I leave Tennessee to head to Texas on the 20th of this month. We are in downsizing, packing, and cleaning mode. We will be living with my grandma for a few months, either until Michael joins us or until middle July. Which ever comes first. After leaving my grandma's house we will all be moving into an RV while we focus on the start of our house. 

I am going to school full time right now. I'm considering putting the kids into public school as soon as we get to Texas or finishing out the year and then just starting them back in public school in the fall.

I am still very leery about settling down in this specific town, but it is the most stable idea. I'm not sure if my discomfort comes from the unknown scars of the place, my thoughts of disadvantage, the thought of rooting my gypsy spirit in one place, the lack of a fresh start, or my fear of losing something I'm not sure I ever really had. I pray God protects us as we move into this uncertainty. It is however very exciting. New chapters in my book of life has always had a sense of adventure and mystery, two things that excites my very being. Will we sink or swim?

Things for the move seem to be falling into place. There is great hope that we will be getting a truck and trailer for the farm at a wonderful deal. Two very important items for the farm. Once we move and Michael finishes our lease here in Tennessee,  we will hopefully have a good amount saved to get our septic and electric ran at the farm.

We had some paperwork that had to be taken care of, but I think everything is squared away and ready to go.

Thomas is picking up words like a champ. When Michael rejoins us in Texas I think he will be impressed with Thomas's vocabulary.  I sure am going to miss that man while we are apart again. It was a little less than a year ago that we had gotten him back from his last deployment with the Army. Now we prepare to separate again, but on a different set of circumstances. Hopefully communication will be better this time around. 

I greatly look forward to spending time with my grandma and my best friend in Texas though. They are two of the best people I know. Also another one of my favorite people will be here for a visit tomorrow!  I am excited!

Birthday fun

My younger daughter, Kayley, turned 4 Wednesday. We won't be celebrating it til Saturday though. The plan is to have a Minnie mouse tea party for her birthday. Tomorrow morning I will be baking pink and purple sugar cookies.

For Logan's last birthday we had pizza, ice cream, and a water balloon fight. Next year is going to be tough for his birthday because we will just have moved again. We will probably have a party for him in Rockport being that we have family there and it's a good midpoint from us and the rest of the family.

Poor Michael Wayne, he always seems to get the short straw being that his birthday is so close to Christmas. I have hopes that once we get settled at the farm and lay down some roots that things will be different for all the kids.

Tonka's birthday wasn't much to holler about but everyone was happy that daddy made it home for his 1st birthday.

Sara has always had a lot of friends which made it easy to have a party for her. Last years was a bust because everyone was sick and daddy was deployed, but we will make it up this year. The big 8! Hard to believe that little baby that turned my world upside-down when I was 17 will be 8 in 2 months! Both girls said they want horses for their birthdays. Ha! Sorry girls not this time around.

Sara also says she wants to learn to train horses like daddy does :D. My kids make me proud every day. This week,  Logan wants to be a fire fighter in Texas, Michael Wayne wants to be a police officer, Sara wants to be a horse trainer,  Kayley wants to be a farmer. I want to be a kid when I grow up lol. Dream big babies, then reach out and grab it!

Tonka seems to be picking up a new word at least every other day. I am so proud of him, but it breaks my heart that my last little baby is growing so very fast and there won't be any more little ones to cuddle. It hurts but the future is bright as we open new chapters for each one of them. 

A good, valuable friend of mine cut the girls and my hair recently. She did an absolute wonderful job. I really like my cut and both girls look gorgeous. Sara complies to the request to brush her hair and Kayley's curls are bouncy and free. I find that my hair is a lot more manageable now too. I took probably close to 8 inches off.

Our time tables for going home may have changed some. Only time will tell, sooner then later though. So much to do and so little time to achieve it in. 

30 day Facebook challenge

My husband and I decided that Facebook was taking up to much of my time so I'm Facebook detoxing. The only reason you will see this on my blog fan page is because I can post it from my phone without logging on to it. So 30 days with no facebook and I will be re-amping my look. If I can't stick it out it's $100 in motorcycle parts for him. Wish me luck we are on day 4 now.

We switched up our curriculum a little again too. We will continue with all in one homeschooling for reading and math, but going back to Abeka for history, health, and science. We shall see how that goes for now. I'm also looking into Classic Curriculum for reading and math along side Ray's Arithmetic and Mcguffey Readers. I would like to move away from relying heavily on the internet for school because I don't know how much access we will have at the farm in the beginning. 

Last night the girls and boys spent the night at friends' houses and Michael and I went out on a dinner date and dancing. It was wonderful even if we didn't get home til after 4 and were up by 7 to take the kids to a rodeo. It was a lot of fun with some pretty great people.  I didn't feel quite so old for once even if my husband has a big mouth at times when he should bite his tongue. However, I am so glad that is not a weekly reoccurring ritual. I very much enjoy hanging out with my kids and, funny enough, take comfort in my to do list waiting for me every day. I like my no makeup, mix matched socks, loose fitting t-shirts, and hair up in a bun. I love kissing my husband in the kitchen when he comes to pick at what I'm cooking. I love holding sleeping babies and watching my children grow. 

My oldest sister Jenny, just moved to a city closer to where our farm is in Texas.  Hopefully, she will become a more active part of the kids and my life once we get all moved back next year. I am honestly considering moving back home sooner then later. First, I really miss my other sister, Heather, who is also my best friend. Not to mention my niece and nephew. Second,  I really want to spend more time with my grandma then I really think I will get to this summer. It feels like it will be rushed. Third, I want to get a garden in the ground this spring so that we will have a good harvest come fall time when my husband will be joining us.

Heather called me today to tell me she replaced her car's alternator pretty much by herself. I'm so proud of her. She did a real good job. Not that I have to, but it makes me worry a little less about my loved ones when I know they have the knowledge to be less co-dependent on other people for help. Like paying a mechanic to simply replace an alternator. I think it's a waste for such an easy task and a lifesaver at times to be self sufficient. 

letter to myself

Driving around today going to appointments and running errands I thought about myself for a few minutes.  I came home did some cleaning, worked on dinner, and let my thoughts drift away with the music from days long gone. If I could have written myself a letter and some how got it to myself at 13 what would I have said. Here is what I came up with:

Jessy,

Things seem terrible now but keep your chin up it is worth it! All the pain and heartache will be paid back to you in with all the love and blessings.  Evil people lurk everywhere in this world don't let them take away from you the best things you have. Your faith, joy, and innocence are beautiful gifts. You are only a victim if you let them have the upper hand on you.

Keep on keeping on,
Jessy

Jessy, 
Girl, 14 is fun! Stop holding on to those ambers that keep burning your heart. Live! You can't see it now, but everyone loves you! Embrace it instead of dwelling on your hurt. I promise you, you don't have to try, you are loving, you care, you are spunky, and fun. Focus on that, never leave the little guy behind. GO TO CLASS even if you are bored! Colleges don't care about your potential or how well liked you are just what's on that paper at the end.

Love your life,
Jessy

Jessy,  wow 15! Congratulations you are still with us. Hey I know you think you are in love and he is an awesome guy, but doll he's going to leave you and while it's going to hurt savour it while he's here. Enjoy this summer with him, ignore the rumors, you know they aren't true and don't feel the need to make them true. When he leaves you when school lets back in don't take it so hard. Stay his friend after you have had your time to heal. Trust me you have forever touched his heart and left a glowing smile, but if you push it will take a long time to build back a friendship with him. Now the rebound from him gets interesting. Brace yourself its a wild spiral of a ride. Don't lose yourself.

You got this,
Jessy

Jessy, you sure you are only 16? You have taken some interesting paths here. First off, just because you seem to have the bad boy that all the girl swoon over around your finger doesn't mean you should. You got hurt, don't jump back into a relationship so fast. You need longer to be you, just you, not you and him. You are not going to listen to me or anyone else though so listen to this. You are going to hurt yourself more then you have ever hurt before, but don't cast out your friends because you took a new path. You will never get this back. You will lose all the people that adore and admire you for a guy. Just be you! Stop striving to be societies normal, you broke that mold, don't conform to it, you are worth so much more then you think.

GO TO CLASS!
Jessy

Jessy,  well hey most people don't become adults or parents for several more years, but congratulations on your pregnancy in 2.5 months. While you are going to make so many more FLAT OUT FOOLISH mistakes, partially because you are a CHILD and have no right making adult decisions,  you are going to have to lay down in the bed you make. Not that you ever do, but don't blame anyone else for your struggles and pain. Focus on that little baby, she is going to be your saving grace. Be quick to say you are sorry and rebuild those bridges full heartedly with family and friends. Do not lose your faith, no matter how much pain you have don't let it break your spirit. Things do change, people don't usually unless they want it.

God speed beautiful,  I'll be praying for you
Jessy

So, 18, dropped out of high school, gave up on all your dreams, hate your life, no real friends or family. Your mom is the only person who still thinks you have hope and you are pregnant again. It is going to get worse before it gets better. One of the best decisions you make in a good while is to tell that doctor to shove it when they try pressure you. My only advice is to stop taking that medication. Doctors do not know everything and keep your faith. You are going to need it. Tell your dad what he means to you. He will go to bat for you when you feel helpless. You are daddy's little girl after all.

Pray more often,
Jessy

19, I told you that doctors don't know everything! He's got some health issues, but isn't he beautiful. He is the sweetest and loving baby! People snub their noses at you so often. Things can't seem to get worse. Your pain is mental and physical. You hurt so bad, but don't lose hope. Those babies need you so much. PRAY! God is on your side! Dream!  God is listening! He knows. You are worthy! feel like you have nothing left including yourself. It may be true,  but God, those babies, and your mom are rooting for you! Give it to God. He will make light at the end of the tunnel.

You are not worthless
Jessy

20, I told you there was light at the end of the tunnel. He is the one. He cares about your dreams and happiness. It will not always be sunshine and rainbows, but never doubt his love. He has been hurt and jaded so don't compare. He will stand by you no matter what. He will choose you. This is the best thing. You have lived through a lot of hurt, but that isn't his fault. Feel the sunshine on your skin again.  Learn to live again.  You have so many journeys to look forward to. Rebuild you. Be the you, you dreamed of. Build your family happy and strong.

Smile,
Jessy

P.s. see you off the path, around a corner and down a dirt road. Spoiler you graduate high school! Congratulations!

Autumn

Happy fall 2013!

     I've been looking forward to this since winter last year. We already have our fire pit dugout for those crisp evenings in the back yard. If the weather is good we are going to camp out in the yard next weekend. Traditionally the 1st day that has a hi under 75 we strike up the fire pit and under 65 we make chili.
     Those of you that follow my Facebook page know that we will be changing curriculums starting today. I personally am very excited.
     Girl scouts, boy scouts, 4-H, and now a book club are all in full swing and taking a lot of time up, but I love seeing how much the kids are enjoying it all. They are all so eager to start a new adventure as soon as we finish one. We have also perused pen pals again.  Sara and Kayley have started writing the same pen pals as last year, but Sara would like a second pen pal (she is almost 8). If you have a child that maybe interested please contact me on our blog fan page on facebook.
      We have pumpkin patches, pioneer exhibits, lots of lapbooks, our traditional family apple day, mini golf, and hopefully a fall festival on the agenda for this fall. We can't wait to share it all with you. I hope to have the pictures up from our backwoods camping trip this week.